Black dog is talking
Oct. 25th, 2018 08:41 amMarian and I served an excellent feast on Saturday. I took pictures!
But once again, all the comments I'm seeing are how great a job Marian did. SHE came in underbudget. SHE did an amazing job. *sigh* I agree, but she didn't do it alone. She did an awesome job of reminding people that she didn't do it alone. Every time someone made a comment to her, she always reminded them that I was her co-cook. There were a few people who made a point at the event of telling me thank you. I appreciate that. But I'm so damned tired of being invisible. It makes me want to throw up my hands and walk away.
I have no idea how to change this, except to cook a feast all on my own, but I have no desire to kill myself off just to open other people's eyes.
But right now, it's all lending itself in support of the black dog of depression who is telling me that I don't matter, that no one gives a damn about me, I make no difference in this world.
But once again, all the comments I'm seeing are how great a job Marian did. SHE came in underbudget. SHE did an amazing job. *sigh* I agree, but she didn't do it alone. She did an awesome job of reminding people that she didn't do it alone. Every time someone made a comment to her, she always reminded them that I was her co-cook. There were a few people who made a point at the event of telling me thank you. I appreciate that. But I'm so damned tired of being invisible. It makes me want to throw up my hands and walk away.
I have no idea how to change this, except to cook a feast all on my own, but I have no desire to kill myself off just to open other people's eyes.
But right now, it's all lending itself in support of the black dog of depression who is telling me that I don't matter, that no one gives a damn about me, I make no difference in this world.